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(Sid Hoeltzell © Miami 2022)

Chef Sid’s Cajun Crawfish BBQ, a Springtime Tradition

‘Ya gotta suck da head and bite da tail!’

by

Back in 1975, I enjoyed some road trippin’ down to New Orleans with close buddies from the University of Buffalo to experience my first Mardi Gras celebration – smoking hashish, trying to bunk in flophouses and generally staying drunk half the days. It was all part of the menu.

Oysters, hurricanes – the kind that come in a glass – and crawfish were our choice culinary staples, and sleeping in the 442 Oldsmobile or on a Biloxi beach was the lifestyle. Though I won’t snooze in cars anymore (or pass out on a beach), I have joyously maintained my addiction for authentic crawfish boils and try to share this savory Cajun tradition with as many souls as I can before I pass into the “between.”

I made it a point to learn how to make my own boils. It took several years and countless bags of fresh live crawfish before I understood the finesse and subtleties of the perfect boil, which I now bestow upon you.

I first started serving up this 29-year tradition in 1991, after I moved down here from New York City. My brother was a very successful neurosurgeon in Broward County. He and a few other docs would throw a party once a year to celebrate their success in the field – administrators, pharma reps, patients and hospital staff all attended these lavish events at the local Elks clubs.

There were swing bands, waiters, valet service and bubbly, but very blasé food spreads. Chicken wings (I had my fill in Buffalo), cuts of celery, carrot strips, cheese cubes, cheese balls – I shudder at recalling those horrible and blandly boring offerings.

That’s when I decided I would start throwing an annual party to show my appreciation of a successful year as well. Delivering on that pledge would always be about crawfish and a tasty top-shelf beefy BBQ. Thirty years later, it still is, with the exception of this two-year COVID sabbatical.

Over the past few decades, “Sid’s Annual Crawfish BBQ” has certainly grown in reputation, scope and content. The event started out at Power Studios, ran through South Point Park and eventually found its current home at Crandon Park on Key Biscayne.

For 19 years, my annual par-tay was an all-you-can-eat and drink (responsibly) extravaganza of spicy Cajun crawfish (275-300 pounds), 50 prime steaks, an 80-pound roast pig and all the fixings. One year it was planned as an Everglades Restoration fundraiser, with Marjory Stoneman Douglas letting me add her to the guest list. (Sadly, a local tornado canceled that one.) After the 2010 Haiti earthquake, I started asking people to make donations to a Haitian relief effort, and have since been able to donate more than $11,000. Since we are so blessed, it’s great to feed it forward!!!

From the beginning, my guests have always contributed their own treats to the festivities. Great-tasting food is the glue that binds us all and head sucking brings people together like nothing else. The bonds we’ve built over a plate of crawfish will never end.

This soirée is all about having fun – see the 300+ Jell-O shots in a hidden cooler –and not about abusing the privilege of having a good time. I have always been a stickler about not overdrinking and driving, but when it comes to overdosing on crawdads … go for it.

I always repeat the mantra: “Suck the head and bite the tail.” And after nearly 30 years of sharing births, passings and everything in between, that mantra has never changed. My friend Phil always brought his adolescent son to the parties; nowadays his son brings his son as well – three generations of head suckers! I even once had a Baton Rouge, La., guest let me know that my boil was better than his family’s. (Who’s your daddy now?!)

My invitation-only crawfish boil is about a Cajun tradition, and now you can start one, too. I have been buying my fresh crawfish from a single trusted source for more than 25 years – Sal’s Riverside Seafood outside New Orleans. A great spice, shrimp and Metairie red-onions can also be yours, if you ask politely. My go-to spice source is from Deep South Blenders: Cajun Land Complete Seafood Boil (but dat’s just half da secret y’all).

A perfect boil is all about the prep, purge and of course, the spices. And since I’ve decided that the party must go on when the pandemic subsides, I’m passing on its secrets, tips and method to you. Are you smellin’ what I’m t

ellin’?

CHEF SID’S CAJUN CRAWFISH BBQ

Prep time: Days of work hauling beverages, contracting ice deliveries, picking up liquor donations, finalizing the guest list and extending the invites … all fun!

Serves: A 35-pound bag of crawfish serves about 20 people, considering other menu items will be on hand.

MUST HAVES

·     BBQ area

·     60-quart cooking pot with basket/cage

·     Outdoor burner

·     Running water

·     Large coolers or 5-gallon buckets (for storage and then purging the crawfish)

·     6″-12″ round mesh skimmer with long handle (to wrangle da crawfish)

·     10-quart plastic box to toss the bugs in for respiring after the boil

INGREDIENTS

·     35-pound sack of live crawfish

·     2 pounds fresh garlic cloves, smashed (skin on)

·     12 medium onions, quartered (skin on)

·     3 large bunches celery, chopped into 2″-3″ chunks

·     18 lemons, halved

·     2 pounds authentic Cajun spice (Do not be pusillanimous and cheap out with that Old Bay stuff … amateur!)

·     6-pound bag of Sal’s Riverside Homemade Seafood Boil

In lieu of Sal’s blend you can try your hand at recreating mine. You’ll end up with more than two pounds of spice for the boil and extra seasoning, my preference:

·     1 1/4 pounds Cajun Land Complete Seafood Boil (It’s so strong, you need to cut it 100% with sea salt.)

·     1 pound sea salt

·     2 ounces ground cinnamon

·     1 ounce ground cloves

·     2 ounces powdered onion

·     2 ounces powdered garlic

PREPARATION

But first, a warning: Never cook a dead crawfish – never! Crustaceans must always be alive and chilled out/purged until you’re ready to give them their final farewell bath. Never forget this rule. If they ain’t kickin’, they’re not worth the lickin’.

·     Crawfish are pretty durable and I have them flown in through refrigerated freight, just like restaurants do. They arrive at Southwest Cargo at Fort Lauderdale-Hollywood International Airport. Set aside time to pick them up, though I’ve left them there overnight on some occasions without too much loss. The helpful people at Sal’s Riverside will provide all the details for making your boil work out. The bitch is the price to ship these live babies – but good food ain’t cheap and cheap food ain’t no good.

·     You must purge the crawfish. Some people use salt, I use baking soda. Place live crawfish into a cooler or bucket

filled with water and toss in about X baking soda. Let them sit about 3 minutes, then rinse with a hose until water changes a few times and comes out clear; this process improves the taste. Remove all floaters and dead crawfish.

·     When all the live crawfish are purged, place them in a cooler or bucket filled with ice.

·     Fill pot with water, place on stove and heat to a rolling boil.

·     Toss in garlic, onion, celery and lemons, after giving them a big squeeze, and about 2/3 pound spice; boil about an hour, until veggies infuse water.

·     Using the cage, drop a few quarts of crawdads into the boiling spiced water at a time. After they boil for a few

minutes, they’ll start to float/rise to the top and turn bright red. About five minutes later they’ll all have floated to the top; lift them out with a skimmer.

·     Place these steaming babies into a container and throw in a handful of ice – this trick keeps the juices in the shell. After shaking container several times to cool off the crawfish a bit, drain water and re-spice those beauties with a few teaspoons of fresh spice. Quickly repeat the process until all the crawfish have been cooked, taken an ice bath and been re-spiced.

·     Now plate and eat! Remember to grab the crawfish and twist it apart. Hold the head in one hand and crush as you suck out the savory juices, toss the head and then pinch the tail to squeeze out the tail meat as you carefully bite it out of the shell.

·     Do this several hundred times and be happy.

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